Let’s see, where were we?
Abigail sends the breads and food ahead and promises the servants she’s right behind them, “But she did not tell her husband Nabal.” (v 19). Ah, wise Abigail. Abigail knows her husband well, she also knows that lives are at stake and in this situation, silence is golden. It wasn’t the time to start a fight with her hubby about how foolish his response was, because surely he his mind wouldn’t be changed anyway.
When she arrives at Davids camp, he’s preparing for a fight. Now, pay close attention to how she handles it, how she begins her very eloquent speech.
“She fell at his feet and said: ‘My lord, let the blame be on me alone. Please let your servant speak to you; hear what your servant has to say.” (1 Sa 25: 24) WHAT?!?!?
Abigail, what are you doing? It’s not your fault! She puts herself in a physical position of humility at his feet and then says, “It’s all my fault! Hear me out.”
She’s becoming a peacemaker. And there’s no better way to become a peacemaker than to begin by humbling yourself. Jesus, in his sermon on the mount teaches the virtues of becoming meek, or humble, and becoming a peacemaker:
“Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.” (Mt 5:5) “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God.” (Mt 5:9)
Being humble goes hand in hand with being a peacemaker. I don’t like admitting when I’m wrong. And I really don’t want to take the blame when I’m not wrong! But I could take a hint from Abigail, a humble heart can help restore balance when there is a disagreement. And learning to apologize can be a timely blessing.
I am not saying that wives should become doormats, always taking the blame! But being a model of humility and being a peacemaker can be a blessing. Apologies are much more effective when they come from a place of sincerity and humility. (Man, that’s hard to do!) And she wasn’t interested in blame, she was concerned with what was in her household’s best interest.
Moms need to be peacemakers. I constantly feel like I’m refereeing a rowdy game of crazy between my boys. Who took what. Who hit who. Who’s on first. (No wait, that’s something different entirely.) But God didn’t call me to just referee, He called me to be a peacemaker. It’s not just about figuring out what the foul is and on whom, it’s about restoring peace in the house so we can live harmoniously.
Fellow moms, we’ve got a tough job.
God calls us to be peacemakers. Sometimes that means apologizing to our kids (or husbands!) when we make a mistake (because we do make mistakes…sometimes…or is it just me?) Sometimes that means listening to all sides and teaching our children to humble themselves with an apology. Sometimes, instead of insisting on placing blame, (especially when I have no clue because I wasn’t there) it means everyone needs a break to recover in separate corners.
Abigail she was not the person who needed to apologize, but in a world that believes in passing the buck, how refreshing to see Abigail, as humble peacemaker, say the buck stops here.
(1 Samuel 25)